This Opinion article is part of a Narcity content series. The views expressed are the author’s own and do not necessarily reflect the views of Narcity Media.
Picture this: I was 27 years old and had fallen in “love” for the first time and was meeting up with my boyfriend at the Starbucks by Union Station for what I thought was a quick post-work hangout only to get dumped. I then had to walk by that same spot twice a day for years during my commute to and from work.
Getting your heart broken is brutal no matter where it happens, but there are some parts of Toronto where it is simply unacceptable to break up with someone. On the other hand, if you do have to break the bad news to someone, there are a few options out there that might be the ideal location.
Here’s a list of places in Toronto where you should never dump someone and some suggestions for where to tactfully do the deed.
Don’t: On the TTC or GO train
As I mentioned earlier, I once got dumped right before my evening commute home and had to sit in the Quiet Zone of the GO train while holding back tears and sitting in a quad with three uncomfortable-looking businessmen who did their best to ignore my stifled sobs.
Do not break up with someone on public transit. Whether it’s the subway, the bus or the train, it is far too public of a situation in an environment where people are just trying to mind their own business and get from point A to B. It’s also doubly uncomfortable because it’s not like the people around you can leave — they either have to wait til their stop to exit the scenario or try and navigate to another spot, which isn’t always possible.
Also, these spaces tend to be crowded — no one wants to be pressed up against another person while they detail to their soon-to-be ex all of the reasons why they’re going to leave them.
At the very least, wait until you get off of your chosen method of transportation to dump someone. Please.
Do: Any of the parks
If you’re uncomfortable being alone with someone when you dump them, breaking the news to your significant other at one of Toronto’s parks isn’t a bad idea.
High Park, Trinity Bell Woods, Grange and Riverdale are all great candidates, provided they aren’t super busy. They offer just enough privacy to have a conversation about why things are ending that won’t be overheard by strangers while also offering an easy way to escape once you’ve done the deed.
Just make sure you don’t do it during cherry blossom season — the last thing your ex probably wants is to be captured crying in the background of some influencer’s very aesthetic Insta post.
Don’t: Anywhere in the PATH
The underground PATH is a weird liminal space that exists pretty much solely for the function of busy people getting from one place to another with minimal fuss and without having to go outside.
In between dodging people trying to hand out coupons for nonsense that you don’t need, the very last thing you want to deal with is someone crying while blocking one of the main doors to First Canadian Place.
There are just way too many people trying to navigate the PATH for someone to be standing still, let alone having a full-on emotional breakdown — let’s leave those scenarios for above ground only!
Do: Any generic Tim Hortons
If you know there’s a Starbucks or Tim Hortons that the person you’re dumping goes to frequently or has to pass by every day, for the love of God, do not break up with them at that location as they’ll just have to think of the trauma every time they pass by it.
That being said, a random Tim Hortons they likely won’t have to return to isn’t a bad opportunity in terms of delivering a breakup. You could even get them a baked treat and a hot chocolate to soften the blow!
Don’t: In the Distillery District
With cobblestone roads and incredibly cute signs, stores and Instagram-worthy spots to snap lovey-dovey pictures, the Distillery District is up there in terms of places not to break up with someone.
The area itself is usually littered with obnoxiously happy couples (myself and my partner included) doing adorable things, so getting dumped in this area would be an unnecessarily cruel blow.
I mean, there are multiple heart-shaped installations to pose in front of – the place is meant for romance, not heartbreak!
If for some reason you do have to dump someone in this area, please make sure it’s not while the Christmas Market is on — nothing says holiday cheer like crying into your mulled wine while lovers sway under the fairy lights to carols, right?
Do: The food court at the Eaton Centre or Dufferin Mall
Unlike other public areas, I feel like all bets are off when it comes to what kind of behaviour is acceptable in food courts, particularly in the busier malls like Dufferin or the Eaton Centre.
These locations are usually filled with people grabbing a quick bite who are unbothered by what’s going on around them, due to the necessity of how wild things can get in there.
Getting dumped at a food court isn’t the worst thing in the world, because you’re likely not bothering other people and at least after you can grab a Cinnabon or a burger after its over to fill the hole in your heart.
Don’t: At a sports event
Like the Distillery District, people are at a sports game to have a good time so breaking up with someone at a Jays, Leafs or Raptors game is a bad move.
You’re going to bring down the vibe of the people around you who likely can’t escape you due to the fact you have to stay in your assigned seats, which is just uncomfortable for everyone.
Wait til after the game, folks.
If you are the person delivering a breakup, please remember to be kind, and whatever you do, don’t do it via text message — be better than that!
This article’s cover image was used for illustrative purposes only.
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